Witchcraft comes in sizes!
There is this someone I have always given stuff for years - money and clothes, sometimes for the children.
Last year, we had a chat and I explained how I now have other persons in same category, that I will be splitting it amongst them, especially the clothing so that everyone benefits.
Osim, “no problem , I understand “!
Fast forward to last Christmas, I did the needful and thought all was good until we saw last week.
I felt a different kind of energy - a negative one !
What is wrong? Are you fine? You dont look like the normal you? ....... I was curious to know where the bubbles went to !
And next I heard was, “ I see XYZ with one green dress , e fine well well & I know say e go fit me so well. My mind tell me say na my own but you give her. You know say she get people wey dey help her but she just choose to come short my ration , I no go lie,e dey vex me. She even collect shoes wey be oversize for her shidren. “
Me: “You know I was not under obligation to tell you about the sharing but I did because of relationship and your expectations in and out of season . I also didn’t tell you who the other beneficiaries are ! And wait ooo, even if she is , why will you feel this much sadness over what you don’t own? You are not a good person to try and stop someone’s blessings or lose sleep over it “
And the reply even shocked me more !” Mama , forget that thing , I don even ask her with style and she no deny am , na you dey cover up for her. She for dey her lane na. As she dey see me dey shine dey pepper her , that’s why she come dey join body “
Hmmmmmm
I saw the other lady yesterday and she didn’t give off any impression of someone who was accosted or upset in anyway , I just greeted and moved on .
No need stirring still waters, right?
But deep within me , I’m not impressed at all! You have been the sole beneficiary for years , not just Christmas but round the year!
Why lose sleep over what comes to
Do you know what this is ??
Take a listen !!
The Sour Sop fruit !!!
One of my favorite fruits , it’s so nutritious but expensive.
Ever tried the Soursop ice cream flavour ? Ohlalacious!!
I’m counting down the days 💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾
Now you know !
If you know, you know
Ballers in town !!
Fresh Orange!!
From the tree!
Want some ??? Hapu godi ndu boring na ba mba na background 😎😎😀
Give it up for Tiannah , she is good !
The most creative runway designer in Naija ( my opinion ) .
She knows her craft very well ! Forget her werey
He called himself the Iguana man !
Hung the Iguana around his neck while selling malaria “mericine” of N50!
Hmmm
I lent this speaker to a friend for an indoor party ! A day after, she reported it missing , then narrated how she took her car to the Car Wash and she recalled it never came back .
She was sure she hid it underneath the driver’s seat, that whoever removed it was intentional, it wasn’t lying carelessly on the floor!
Me: Babe , let’s go back to the car wash ! Do you have a Mopol or a guy with strong face ? She nodded !
I was already thinking of my bestie Sornie Etim but distance was a barrier ( rolls my eyes at Sunny man 😂😂)
We got someone!
At the place , come see smor drama !
Her: Hello, I brought my car here yesterday, can you remember me ?
He nodded !
Our Mopol: I need you to bring out the JBL speaker you STOLE from underneath the driver’s seat! The car camera caught you misbehaving but because you look like a first time offender , I will be nice ! Bring it together with the case in 5 mins , not any longer !
Guy bolted like cartoon character , seen Tom running from Jerry ? He returned in a flash with it , with that look of “ pls spare my life , don’t take me to your guard room”
“ Our Mopol” reported him to his boss with a stern warning never to dare again. He is most likely to lose his job - judging from the shock on the face of his employer .
Meanwhile , there is a new Car Wash outlet around my neighborhood, their cashier is HOT.
Her job ?
She inspects the washed cars,dangling ,giggling and wriggling her “ TOOLS “ as she circles the car, then issues receipt as you hand over your money!
Sometimes , you hear her engage her customers in a very light , cheerful conversation, “ How are you Sir? Your face is very familiar , do you live around this neighborhood?…..
The outlet owner show knows biz ! He knows his gender very well and he GAINFULLY employed a suitable cashier!
Praise the lord ! Hallelujah!!!
A few years ago, I surprisingly ran into her at the new Shoprite Mall close in our neighborhood. She said she was in Lagos for Omugwo , her 1st daughter had a baby weeks ago. She promised to make her daughter bring her to my house.
I gave her my number . She doesn’t know the address of her daughter’s house , their driver brought her to come pick a few items for the house .
One week after , I called her to know how she is doing and ask after her hosts , everyone was ok .
Then I asked if she had talked with her daughter , will they bring her over or I should come take her to my home to spend a few hours with us , atleast before leaving town .
She said her daughter is a very busy person hence she doesn’t have an answer yet .
Another week went by , I called again ! Same response ! I asked if I could speak with the daughter and I heard her say they will call back later.
I made a decision, to let them be !
I was only trying to extend my hospitality according to tradition, it wasn’t an obligation . Na me go even spend - entertainment plus gift !
A month later , she called me , she was going to Shoprite and was wondering if I could come over . I wanted to say no but I changed my mind and went to see her .
She apologised and showed regrets she couldn’t come to my home to see my family before her departure , she didn’t give any concrete reason for her inability to come and I didn’t ask!
She summed it as ,” nwam Nwanyi wu a very private person , onaghi aliki mmeko, odiche na umum n’ile” ( my daughter is a very private person , she doesn’t love associating , she is different from all my children )
I just bought a few personal items for her at the mall and wished her safe journey back home .
That was it !
Until last week !
I got a call from a disturbed and frightened caller , she introduced herself . ….
Hello aunty , owu XX nwa YY n’akpo. Owu mummy’s nyere m number gi. Aunty ,biko, Achorom ibia fu gi na mgbede”( Hello a
Gen. Z Mama in the making
What a Thursday morning !!
I need Coldstone!
